VäporMISSION

 

VäporWho?
We're VäporSystems (rhymes with "whopper"), a Swedish conglomerate of affiliated independent software developers and industry sycophants. VäporSystems was founded in the ashes of the early 90's, when the booze was cheap and the music was bad.

Residing in the lush hills of Mjölby, VäporSystems now stands on the brink of capitalist greatness, with the announcement of VäporOS for the PowerPC.

For the past few years a number of cankerous upstarts have broken through Apple's tough (but mealy) pulp in an attempt to create a better operating system. Some of these efforts have been more successful that others; one company decided to port their system to garden-variety Macs after realizing that the only people buying their hardware were Babylon-5 groupies. A few adventurous folks even have the notion that the best OS is a free OS.

Learn more about our rich Skandinavian heritage...
and meet interesting Swedes


Why a free OS won't work
A free OS is an enticing idea for the end user, but a free OS is purely a labor of unrequited love, no matter the level of dedication and resources. In the end, the free OS developer answers to one person; his mom peeking down into the basement. You lose.

Why a shrink-wrap OS won't work
Web cruisers are getting used to downloading stuff; big stuff; for free, beta status be damned. People simply don't want to pay for anything anymore. The commercial OS developer answers to one person, and that's his landlord. You lose.

Why VäporOS works
At VaporSystems, we have a different philosophy; VäporOS will be entirely advertiser-driven ; you don't pay for the software, and we don't get stuck in the basement. VaporSystems answer to one person; the sponsor. You still lose, but at least we're making buckets of money doing it.

 

Technical Specifications

VäporOS is a fully preemptively multitasked, multiuser, multithreaded, multicultural, object-oriented, symmetric-multiprocessing, platform-independant, modern operating system. Its advanced VäporKernel implements an anti-time architecture which predicts what instructions are going to be operated on and calculates the output before it receives the input.*

This allows never before imagined performance from ordinary hardware. The VäporApp Application model is very easy to develop for; all inter-application communication is accomplished using message-passing. Currently, messages are limited to null-terminated character strings of length 1, but we plan for this limit to grow exponentially in the future. Also, the advanced Pluggie Plier architecture allows the operating system to be extended without writing any code, as long as the sponsor is ISO-9000 compliant.

*Warning: improperly written applications that access the kernel can cause space-time anomalies. VäporSystems will not be responsible for paradoxes caused by poor programming techniques.


Interested in becoming a VäporDeveloper? Drop us a note! With each accepted application you get a free Dala Horse, the symbol of Sweden.